Saturday, September 26, 2009

Take a break.

One thing each of us faces at some point in our lives is the need to take a break.  Your 20s are for excelling in the workplace, wearing trendy clothes, having fabulous friends you travel the states to visit, etc but if you don't occasionally take a break you will be wearing your life on your face by 30.

I just finished week 2 of a new job and I was pooped by 5:00 yesterday.  New learning at work plus nightly commitments outside of work had really kick my butt.  I cancelled all plans and came home.  Lit some candles, plugged in a new Bath & Body works wallflower, took a long shower, and curled up in bed with a book.  Don't be afraid to give yourself a night in and maybe even go to bed before 10 every once in a while.

You may only be young once but I for one, would like to look young forever.

Your body knows what it needs so pay attention and when it's begging for a break, give in!  You may find, like I, that actually enjoy the occasional night in by yourself.

Love,
B

Monday, August 31, 2009

When things start going right...

By nature the three of us ladies who write into this blog (Alyssa, I'm still including you in this even though your entries are slackin!) are positive people. We've undergone an incredible amount of change in the last year with what I can only describe as grace. As Mer and I embarked on adventures in young adulthood in the Florida area, and she later moved back home - Alyssa has been planning her wedding to the love of her life back home in Indiana. A wedding I can't wait to attend next weekend, by the way! With the exception of a few bad days here and there we've kept upbeat go-get-em attitudes in this crazy post-grad year.

That being said, what happens when it things start going right? Not that anything in my life in Florida has been particularly bad or overly difficult but right now things are really falling into place. I spent a few months in limbo after finding out my current job may or may not have funding as of Oct 1st of this year I had put out some applications and put plans on hold.

I then went through a whirl-wind adventure of jumping through hoops to get a position with Child Protection Services. After completing months of lie detectors, interviews, and physicals I was offered a position! The hard part was, by then I knew it just wasn't the right opportunity for me. I knew the job and the benefits were incredible and there was no lack of feeling honored on my part to be given such an opportunity. It was the right job, it just wasn't my right job.

Back to limbo I went - playing the waiting game as I stayed in contact with a Director from a company I'd been dying to work for. We started chatting and they were entering a time in which they were going to be doing some hiring and she was interested in me for the position of her assistant. Honestly, I couldn't think of a more perfect opportunity for me. A company I love and a director I adore. I had that at my current job and so as I thought about moving on, my desire was to still to feel that way. I got both of those and the added security of knowing my job would be here to stay.

Throughout those months of limbo I struggled with feeling like my whole life was hanging in the balance. Not just this work decision and where I would be come Oct. 1st but also with housing. I want to buy my first home. I may have blogged about this in the past, I can't quite remember. But until I settled on a job, there was no way I could comfortably pull the trigger on buying a condo. So again, more limbo.

As I thought forward to the fall and holidays, how could I plan the rest of my year with the biggest contributing factor (my job) still undetermined. Do you see where I'm headed with this? My life was on hold. This is a frustrating feeling I'm sure many of you can related too!

Flash forward to present and I'm finishing up my last 2 weeks at my current job and preparing to transition to my new position in events with a non-profit organization that will put be planning, traveling, and helping execute events with professional sporting teams. Right up my alley. My own father being a professional football coach, I feel like these are my people! I will be promoting Dad's taking active roles in their kids lives. I've been blessed to have a Dad who went above and beyond to do this for me and my sisters. We have always been a priority.

So now, what happens when things start going right? That's the title of this entry and that's what I'm exploring now. My job fell into place and with it has come other progress. I've found THE condo and am waiting on Daddy dearest approval to place at offer. This weekend I went through my closet and analyzed my work wardrobe to see what I will need for my new position. I asked for a Kindle for my upcoming birthday, as I think I will love having it for my travels. I also bought myself a new camera to document as I see new cities!

Holiday plans are still in the works as I'm trying to best coordinate with my sisters who both live in different states from each other and yours truly. After months of being on pause my life feels as though it's in fast-forward. It's been less than a week since the ball began rolling so I supposed the answer is that I don't know yet what happens when things are going right but I'm enjoying the ride.

I wish the same for each of you. That after the hard times come some gut-retchingly exciting moments in fast forward. It is a good place to be in. A welcomed change from a long limbo in my own life.

Love,

B

Monday, August 17, 2009

The Art of Eating In.

Alright lovelies, I've taken on a new task. I'm committing to start eating in. Gasp, I know. As a 20-something with a career and a whole list of other weekly activities eating in has gone by the wayside. It is time to get back in the groove. In part, for my waistline. Eating out is not the new black when it comes to flattery! Also, it's time to cut back on wasted money spent stuffing my face and focus on furthering my financial savvy.

Kicking it in to gear last week, I committed to eat lunch at work. If you're like me, you see lunch time as your chance to escape. Whatever drama or lack-there-of your work day may be bringing about, you get to leave for one glorious hour. On bad days this is the perfect chance to eat your feelings, Mean Girls style. Well no more. Not for this girl. Time to crack down and eat in - even at work! Even on crappy days.

I'm hoping this will give me the chance to expand my mind by freeing up some of my lunch break daily to read, read, read! Thankfully, since I'm such a social butterfly that I hate spending meals alone, one of my coworkers and good friends is doing this with me. So we're lunching together - chatting & reading in intervals. What a help she has been.

Also, I'm trying not to dine on the go. I find that not only do I eat crap for food when I eat on the go but I eat too much of it. This tends to be my error around dinner time as I think of cooking and then having to clean up after myself. Usually I have to be somewhere again by 7, so why not eat in the car and save myself some trouble? This is murder on my wallet, and my health too I'm sure.

This includes morning Starbucks or McDonald's coffee runs. Sad. Oh, and Panera run ins for bagel. My wallet will thank me for cutting these overpriced morning treats out of my day-to-day and eating a healthy breakfast at home. Want to do the same and have it suck less? Tivo great shows and eat your breakfast in front of the tube. I'm finding that still feels like a treat!

As for dinners...a great way to talk yourself into eating dinner at home is to find a friend who will alternate with you. You feed them once a week, let them feed you once a week. It's really not any more expensive to cook for 2 than one. It's more fun, AND you get one night a week where not only does someone cook for you but you don't have to do the dishes. Score! I love the social aspect of having a dinner buddy too.

Parting advice for those of you looking to cut back your dine-n-dash money (and calories) is to buy stuff you will actually make and eat. It never fails that when I go to the grocery I tell myself that I should get all super healthy raw food and that if that's all that's in my house I'll eat it. Wrong. I will let it rot while eating anywhere but home...avoiding my fridge like the plague. This neither helps my budget nor my health. Time to be real...

Buy food you'll eat. Get meals that you won't have to slave over so that cooking isn't a horrendous chore. Make eating in fun, whatever that looks like in your own life. Better yet, cook enough to last more than one meal. When you live life on the go (like I), it's nice to have something waiting for you. This week for example I have something in the evening Weds, Thurs, and Friday evenings. So, if there's food all divided out for me at home, I can eat it before I have to rush back out to face the next task. And grab a different tuberware on my way out to work the following morning.

That my friends, is the beginning of my journey to master the art of eating in.

Love,
B

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Chase your dreams.

One of the greatest benefits to being 20-something is that you still have time to chase your dreams! M & I have had a great many conversations of this nature. Kiplinger magazine (if you're on twitter follow them @kiplingermedia) said that more people in our age range are taking chances to get the jobs they really desire now than even before the crash of the job market. So there you go, there's your justification.

I'm currently in the process of fighting for my own dream job and I'll let you know as that progresses just where I end up. As I was offered a great job two weeks ago I was faced with a choice, play it safe or gamble on getting the job I'm passionate about. You know from my previous statement that I'm choosing to take a gamble. It may just pan out for me.

Don't be faint of heart my friends - we can get what we want.

One thing I learned in college that has carried over into my young adult life well is that I learned early how good it feels to get what you want. Now I fight for it, tooth and nail. I challenge you to do the same, it's worth the battle.

Chin up loves!

B

Monday, July 13, 2009

If it makes you happier

What happens when you realize you thought you had it figured out, but actually have no clue?

My goal after graduation was to work for a non-profit because you learn how to do everything. You have to work really hard to get results and typically others in the non-profit world also work really hard.

I've found all of these things to be true. But it's not enough. So, where do I go from here?

As 20-somethings, we are goal-oriented from the day we are born. All we are told is that we should finish school and work toward a great career that will provide security and insurance. Hopefully, you love what you do, but the biggest thing is to make sure you're taken care of. I have all these things, and my job is fine, but I'm getting to the point where my job is simply paying my bills. As a non-profit employee, I think it's important to want to give 110% every day to ensure the success of your programs. Not even a year in and I'm already tired of giving my 110%. To be honest, I care a little less every day about my job. I still work hard, but it's because I'm supposed to, not because I want to. Is this what I spent my whole life working toward?

And what happens now that I realize this? Do I just simply quit? Do I look for another job, even though I haven't even been there a year? Or, do I pursue what really makes me happy at the expense of losing some of my current security? Would that really be a bad thing?

My fellow 20-somethings, I hope we are all brave enough to take a chance on our lives and strive for happiness, even if it goes against the status quo.

Friday, July 10, 2009

It's good to be young...

http://tinyurl.com/mekhhn

Here's a little encouragement for us 20-somethings and any 30-somethings reading this blog.  The recession has benefits for us.  You have to learn to take advantage of such things.

Love,
B

Monday, June 29, 2009

Job Market.

The sheer panic that people are experiencing when it comes to the job market is unnerving. Being employed aside even I'm feeling pressure because of the volume of attention this crisis is getting. While it keeps me thankful to have a job to get up for 5 days a week, I still find myself experiencing some anxiety.

On top of that I've been faced with some recent career choices. In a job market that people swear has made it next to impossible for people my age to find a job or even keep one - here I'm blessed enough to have options.

At 23, how do you know what you want out of the rest of your life? For those of us with majors that qualify us for any number of positions (less specilized than say, an electrical engineer) we are faced with choices on a fairly regular basis. Some think that the career you chose determines the one that will follow it. Others live under the assumption that you can change your path at any time.

While I would be inclined to agree with the later party, the crash of the job market that began a few years back and continues to keep the available careers plummeting - this opinion has somewhat changed. Now more than even it is important to make educated, well thought out career plans. For those of us in our early 20-somethings this is even more important!

As the United States builds an elite new breed of career obsessed youngsters, the pressure is on US to keep up or give up.

Here's how I am chosing to deal with this. First, my advice is to be bold. I never, ever encourage blind faith when it comes to your professional life. Question everything and everyone along the way. BUT even in times such as these it is important to be willing to be bold in your career path, having confidence in yourself that you are capable of what you take on.

Second, have a backup plan. While I encourage boldness in career choices I also offer you this bit of advice. Know what you are up against. It is taking people far longer to find jobs these days and so, you must know how to handle that should it come your way. I'm a firm believer in Suze Orman's 'Emergency Fund' plan. Don't live paycheck to paycheck in an economy that is currently seeing 6 months of unemployment between careers!

Support. Find a good support system no matter what your career. It pays to have people who care about your well-being. Always. Mer & Kate for example, have been great for me in this way. They've been my sounding board as I try to figure out my own next step - and really my next 10 steps. We dialog about grad school, career paths, finances. At 23, those are hard things to find in lady friends. So if and when you find those people, hang on tight!

Sorry to the utter lack of entries I have contributed as of late. But I hope this blog continues to be a haven of good 20-something info.

Love,
B

Monday, June 22, 2009

A New Venture

As I'm working full-time for my job that pays my bills, I'm also working on a writing career. I contribute to multiple publications, the newest one being an online style examiner. The more hits my articles get, the more successful the site is (just like anything else). Take a look; it will be updated frequently!

Orlando Fashion and Style Examiner

Enjoy!

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

School's Out for Summer

While we're not in school anymore, it's beginning to feel like real-life and school are still pretty related.

I'm realizing that everyone's travel plans increase during the summer. Our activities increase in anticipation of it, too. So, does this mean that we are all in a "school-mentality" for our whole life? I thought you were only in the school-mentality when you were, well, in school.

I partner with the school system for my job, so my work load gets a touch lighter when school isn't in session. I have plenty to do, but it's based on paperwork sorting and filing (not my favorite things). So, to compensate for the monotonous work, I'm planning for some different things this summer. Making the effort to volunteer, making travel plans, making new goals for the summer that include exploring this place I currently call home. All things that I really could have done during the school year if I wanted to make the time, but now that summer's here, it seems I have "nothing but time" (it's not actually true, hence the quotations). I feel like I'm understanding why vacations are typically taken during the summer. Everyone wants to get out of town. It's like summer brings out everyone's inner-child: June 1st hits and we're all chomping at the bit.

I know, this could very well be due to the fact that I'm a new graduate. Maybe I'm just in summer-mode because this is what I've known since I was 5-years-old. Either way, if you're excited and anticipating adventures for this summer, just know that you're not alone. And if being a grown-up means we're not allowed to think this way, then I guess adulthood will just have to wait.

{M}

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Balancing Acts.

Here are the balls I'm juggling...

*2 jobs = between 55-75 hours per week total.
*2 charities that I volunteer for - both in event related positions
*Searching for a condo
*Maintaining my current house (w/a roommate)
*Book Club (one must be cultured, right?)
*Friendships/Family
*Social networking - let's be honest between 2 blogs, facebook, myspace, & now twitter this totally counts as a ball I juggle daily.
*Working out
*Church - including Sunday mornings, bible study on Wednesday night, and a creative team for the Middle School Group I just agreed to be a contributor for.

Ok that will do for now though you can assume that like you I maintain a household including keeping up with bills, bank accounts, cleaning, shopping, cooking, groceries, bday cards, etc. all the normal day-to-day things that I'm going to give items on the list but we all face. I think they should be counted at least mentally.

So as we all juggle our own balls, or priorities, we have to stop occasionally to evaluate how we are doing at these things. Am I maintaining my house at the level I need too? Am I putting the right amount of time and effort into my family? My friends? Is my work suffering in the name of my other interests and commitments by my level of energy and mental capacity I'm left with when I get there? And so on.

This is a process I learned to live by growing up with my Dad. As a Coach he is always evaluating and re-evaluating systems for achieving goals. He taught me to face life in much the same way. I was challenging myself over the last week to consider this.

As I spent time pouring over my calender for the rest of 2009 (no lie, I really did look at all of it) I had to ask myself if I was spending my time in a way that lines up with the priorities I have set. To use another famous Clyde-ism I am now doing some tweaking which includes:

- Booking a flight & a long weekend to see both my sister & brother-in-law as well as my wonderful, loyal guy friends the Johnson's (Travis, Phillip, and Bennett ...and family!). The boys have made 2 trips to see me since I moved to Florida a year ago, it's my turn to show them some love in their home state of North Carolina. Rachel (my sister) and I were the best of friends all growing up but have done a less than exemplary job of keeping up with each others lives these last few years.
-I up'd my phone time this week - using my time in the car to it's full potential and checking up on my friends for no specific reasons, without an agenda. Just asking them how life is going.
- I left my phone in the car every day at the gym this week and read my book. Knowledge is power friends - use your time wisely.
- I thought about my relationships and friendship the way I think about my closet when I clean it out. And I took the necessary steps towards some revamping. If you think that sounds harsh - do some soul searching. Better to be honest.
- I made the decision to use my PTO wisely - planning a trip to see my parents & baby sis, a trip to see my older sis and family friends, and to work a charity event in Indy for APD.

Next up...facing the facts as I consider whether my finances are reflecting the priorities I claim. I'm getting real, first with myself and then you with dear readers. Buckle up & join me.

Love,
B

Sunday, April 26, 2009

But when?

My sister got married nearly 2 years ago now and as a result I find myself answering the question, "so, when are you getting married?" more and more often.  Let's talk "when", shall we?  Statistically, women are choosing to get married later and later as it becomes both more acceptable and expected for women to pursue careers.  Stay-at-home-moms are fewer and farther between and 30 is the new 20 when it comes to starting a family.

So, I've considered where I stand in this picture.  My gut feeling is I will be slow (and maybe late) to settle down.  I do want to be married someday, though kids are still a toss up in my mind at this point.  I LOVE kids but I could love being Aunt Becca to my darling sisters' kids someday (they don't have any yet) and be content.  I'm not closed off to the idea of having some youngsters of my own someday, just leaving my options open.

What I know for sure is that I have a mental list of that which I hope to accomplish before I tie the knot.  Buying my first home is the one I am tackling currently.  The search has more than begun, it's about 60% done I'd say.  I want to travel.  I want to explore my gifts and interests. I want to give of my time and talents to people, to charity, to making the world a better place.

If you're thinking I sound a little saintly, don't.  I just wish to live a life of my own and then I wish to rediscover the beauty in life all over again with my soulmate.

If you're a 20-something and people keep asking you when you're going to get married - I suggest you think for yourself - when DO you want to get married?  Or is the answer never?  It sure makes it easier to answer that question when it arises.  Know where you stand on important issues and know how to voice your feelings - this will get you far in life and perhaps in love.

Love,
B

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Endless Possibilities

This is to encourage all 20-somethings to go for it, whatever "it" may be....

Graduation is supposed to be the time when you feel like your "life" is starting. You know the job you want to have and if you're lucky, you get it. What no one tells you is that you will change your mind. People tell us that you might not stay on the path on which you foresee yourself, but they fail to tell you that it's inevitable to change course, no matter how many plans you make. You can do all the planning you'll ever need to do and STILL end up in an entirely different place from where you thought you'd be. This seems like common sense, doesn't it?

You think it's common sense until it comes at you full-speed and smacks you in the forehead.

This post will be short and sweet and simply words of encouragement. If you feel like you're drawn to something entirely different from what you're doing right now, explore that. Even if it seems crazy. Even if everyone around you tells you it's insanity, that you'll never be able to do it, that'll it could be the hardest thing you'll ever do. If there's enough drive, you'll pursue the new direction because there's a yearning to find out where it will take you. As 20-somethings, let's take a vow to make like NIKE and just do it. Someone very wise once told me that fear and nervousness are the things that move us. She's a fellow 20-something, and she's right. If it's outside the proverbial box, take a chance and leap out of your comfort zone. It's pretty exciting anticipating where you'll land.

{M}

Friday, April 17, 2009

Love: small word, big feeling

Not even 3 years ago, I thought I'd be happily married. Now I'm here and the fella that once was is no more. (This is actually for the better, so no worries). I thought I'd be one of the many young ladies around me getting engaged, having the bridal shower, doing the bachelorette party, then walking down the aisle to my happily-ever-after.

Now I don't know what the hell I want.

I've been trying this whole "dating" thing. And it's fun for the most part. I've met some cool guys who are good-looking and treat me nicely, but that "thing" is missing. You know, the magical feeling you get whenever you even think about that person. I enjoy my time with these people and I always want to hang out with them again, but it still feels like something is missing. I'm not the romantic-type, either. I gag whenever I hear about couples in love. I've been trying to do that less and less for fear that I'm closing myself off...and maybe I am.

Maybe jaded feelings really can stay with you, even when you're 'over' a serious relationship. That "thing" was definitely present in the relationship I thought I'd end up in. And those feelings haven't returned for anyone else. Is it because they're really not there? Or could it be that I'm choosing to ignore those feelings for fear of what happened the last time?

I'd like to think it's a combination of both, but honestly I think it's because I'm trying so hard to not allow myself to feel those fuzzy feelings again. I feel like I'm too busy and important to be burdened by falling in love, even if it were staring me in the face. And by ignoring my feelings toward someone, I could be pushing away the chance of a lifetime. I was so afraid to take a step forward into dating when a great friend told me, "yes, it's scary. But you just might end up being happy."

When put that way, I think we can all allow ourselves to be happy. That doesn't mean you have to be in a relationship to be happy, of course. But if being in a healthy, loving relationship brings us happiness, then why would we even consider walking away just to be a little bit selfish? Instead of thinking twice before making a decision, maybe I should see how I feel in my heart first. More than likely, the answer will be pretty obvious. Maybe even Love.

{M}

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Say 'uncle'....

While in your 20-somethings it sometimes seems to be impossibly hard to know what you should be able to do and what you will need help with. We want to learn it all and prove to ourselves, our families, our friends, maybe even our significant others that we can tackle all the tasks life throws our way. Along with taking on many new tasks it's important to know when to say 'uncle' and get some help.

For me this became clear when trying to file a partial year residency state tax form for Indiana. I moved in May so I worked Jan-May in Indiana before making Florida my new home. This caused a series of issues when it came to my taxes as there is state tax in IN but none in FL, etc. After making 3 somewhat unsuccessful attempts myself (I didn't submit them because I knew they were wrong) I decided to say 'uncle'.

While in Carmel visiting my parents I decided to seek professional help and I made myself an appointment with H&R block. I have HAD to learn a great many things in the last year but this didn't really seem as though it needed to be one. Here's what I learned from the experience...

There is a reason that people go to school for finances. There are a great many things they need to know that the average person does not. Similar to social work (my profession) there are many faucets that people do not even know they don't know about. Ha! This was crystal clear to me as he continued to say, "Did you claim this?" and I continued to have no idea it was claimable or even a "this" (for example apparently Purdue was considered in the Midwest disaster area for 2008 and so I get more money back).

Also, I realized it was worthwhile to pay someone a little over $150 bucks because after letting him do my state taxes and file an amended federal tax he got me $400 more than I had gotten myself which more than paid for him (and helped supply a job), put more money in my pocket, and kept the IRS from keeping more of my money (I feel they already get their fair share).

I said 'uncle' and I'm proud of it...and a little richer for the experience.

B

Friday, April 10, 2009

246

You know the ladies who contribute to this blog fall into the "20-something" category. We are on our way to great things. We have the whole world at our fingertips. We are working together to help ourselves financially. And now, one of us needs to start taking care of herself physically. 246 is my cholesterol number.

Normal cholesterol falls under 200, so mine is on the verge of being out of control. My triglycerides are also amazingly high, 80 points higher than normal. I like eating healthy. I like working out. Yet, I haven't done either. Because I'm young and invincible...right?

Wrong. When I got these tests back, I was dumbfounded. I didn't think it would be great; in fact I figured there may be some things that I could work on just like anyone else. What I didn't expect was getting a letter with "ABNORMAL - SEE DOCTOR" in bright red ink. No one hopes for that. But, it happened. So now what?

It's time to get real. I eat out more than I think I do. I order the fun and fried. I order the fruity, sugary, alcoholic bevs. What does this equal? A liver that is too tired to do anything else with the extra calories, so it turns them into goo for my arteries.

The moral of the story is that no one is immune to early signs of heart disease. If this 20-something has the potential to be on Lipitor, anyone can. I'm taking the steps to be smart with my money, so why shouldn't I be taking the steps to make sure I can live long enough to enjoy the wealth I acquire?

Over the next few months, I'll be limiting all fried, sugared, and alcoholic fun. Wait, not fun: bad habits. I'll also be working out daily because 1. I actually enjoy it, and 2. it's something that could save my life. I'll be posting updates periodically about my progress (with some more fun things in between, of course). In the meantime, please think about what you're doing to your own body.

{M}

Monday, April 6, 2009

Slack.

I'm giving both myself and you dear reader permission to cut yourself some slack today. As a 20-something it's easy to set out to conquer the world and forget that Rome wasn't built in a day. It takes time, patience, hard work, and yes even a few mistakes to get ahead in life. So here's your get-out-of-jail-free card of the week. I'm telling you, it's ok to cut yourself some slack.

This entry is inspired by my own self-hatred at tapping into my savings this Monday morning. Now, before I get out of control with my slack cutting let me explain. I recently made a plan (with the help of my much more financially advanced Dad's help) to pay off my car in 3 months. That would put me at paying the last penny of my car (and warranty) off at my 2 years mark of owning it. Something I think is fairly rare for a 23 year old fresh out of school. So, in order to do this I made a promise not to use my savings to pay off the car BUT that if I needed to tap into it here and there to make ends meet, I would do so...knowing that once my car is paid off it will be far easier to replenish the funds and move forward into better financial security.

In the words of my wise friend Meredith, "It's better to have no debt and less savings, right?". Indeed. That was my goal, and I'm meeting it. One month left to go and I will be debt free and still have a savings account that I think it worth being proud of.

So why the self-hatred you might ask? Well, while I made it 2 months farther into this process than I thought I could without using some of that savings - I got so use to working enough extra that I wasn't using that resource that when I realized this week I'd stretched as far as I could, I felt disappointed in myself. But the truth is, I'm doing great. In 11 months I have completely changed the way I handle finances and I have given myself a great jump start in the right direction.

But as is typical of me I get ahead of myself. I dream big and I want to succeed in so many ways - that often I forget that there are steps that must be taken to get there. When I whine about this to my Dad he reminds me, "Bekes, I've been working for 40 years to get to where I am...you're not going to make it here in a year". How right he is...

So if your frustrated that you can't solved the world's (or your own) problems in a day, week, or even year...than take a deep breath and celebrate how far you HAVE gotten and the steps your taking to get to where you want to be. The 20's can be frustrating as it's sometimes slow moving to get ahead. So in the name of practicing what I preach here's my celebrations...

In the last 11 months I HAVE...
- made my first savings account of note
- lived on a budget
- provided for myself
- tackled debt
- made financial goals
- filed my own taxes
- learned about the types of credit, morgages, savings accounts, and investments
- And soaked up 3 books about finances to help me in my journe
- Kept all my credit cards paid off but used them to build credit and rewards
- Learned about Fico scores (and learned that mine is excellent)

So cheers friends, to being 20-something and learning as we go!

Love,
B

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Power's in the Purse.




American Express's slogan is, "What's in YOUR wallet"? Move over American Express because what's in my PURSE will knock your over-priced self-righteous socks off. Sorry, never been a fan of AE - I think they're snooty.

On my way to work after being up a solid 2 hours already with a bagel in tote (I woke up hungry this morning, not sure why) I was analyzing my massive bag-of-the-day and thinking to myself that I could probably rule the world with the contents of my Italian leather Abro bag. Which brought my back to an article I read in a magazine sometime in the recent past in which they asked 10 or so twenty-something ladies to empty out their bags and photograph the contents. It was a funny experiment of sorts to see what inside ones handbag and so I will do so for you....







- My Coach planner. I live and die by my color coded scedule kept in my sacred planner. Best investiment I've made yet perhaps. And I recommend everyone get one - the refills are only like 14 bucks a year. Fab.
- My favorite umbrella ever - my Lacoste gator umbrella that UF fans always envy. It rains ALOT in Florida & one should never be caught unprepared.
- Brush & comb to keep my mane under control.
- Coach sunglasses (I collect sunglasses, but I always keep at least one pair in each bag)
- Juicy Couture parfume. My favorite scent.
- Extra pen
- Extra hair rubber band
- Mary Kay lip gloss
- A jump drive (techie of me, right?)
- The Time Travelers Wife - I love to keep a good book in my bag. That way I never have to waste time. Time is too precious to waste, don't you think?
- Pack of Orbit gum Sweet Mint flavor
- Keys - car, house, work, bosses place, etc attached to a MK id holder with all my essentials - cards, clubs, ids, etc.
- Verizon Voyager cell phone (not pictured as it was taking these fine pics)...my lifeline.
- And lastly, packing tape. This may seem odd. However, I use it for a demo I do when I public speak (which is fairly often), so there's frequently a roll of this in my bag.

Done.

A girl's purse is often her source of power, or so a guy once told me while refusing to fish something out of mine for me. According to that theory and the size of my bag plus the extent of the content, I'm ready to rule the world.

Done & Done.

Love,
B

Monday, March 23, 2009

The Lost Generation

Props to a certain Chicagoan for sending me the video on which this post is based...

I find it interesting and scary growing up today. Interesting because I'm learning new things every day about myself and the world around me. Interesting because as a young woman, I'm feeling more and more comfortable in my own skin. I truly believe this is because of the good people I am so grateful to have in my life and the fact that, well, I'm slowly ceasing to care about what other people think (to an extent because my recent personality profile shows that I'll always care at least a little bit, but I'm managing). But with all this learning happening, sometimes the scary stuff makes its way into your learning process.

Example: I'm learning that there are no guarantees. I could lose my job tomorrow. I could end up bankrupt. I could end up "happily" married, and within 5 years, be slapped with a divorce. Bills are constantly arriving in my mailbox, which can be overwhelming. Not impossible, just overwhelming. I'm learning that finances worry me, but I'm also learning how to overcome that worry. I'm learning that love is unpredictable and also overwhelming (no wonder people stress out, we're all overwhelmed all the time). I'm learning that I'm scared of things I never thought I'd ever be scared of. So the question for this post is this: WHY?

Is it really because I can't pay my bills? No. Is it because I'm fed up with relationships and dating and want to call it quits on finding my soulmate? No. Could it be that we are the generation that is being TOLD what will happen to us? Could it be that our generation is so overwhelmed with what older generations are telling us, that we're scared to move an inch outside our comfort zone to change our own futures?

Here's the moral of this story: I'm going to make an effort to stop listening. I understand that older generations are supposed to be wiser, but is it really wise to tell the generations coming up behind you what they can't, won't, and will never be able to do? Shouldn't we feel encouraged that we are capable of living the lives we want? I'd like to think I'm on the verge of greatness, but it may not be the same greatness that other generations experienced before us.

I have hope that our generation will keep fighting for what we want. We'll keep fighting for what we think is right. The key will be to support each other in the process.

{M}

Friday, March 20, 2009

Men & Money

My recent obsession with finances lead me to Rich Dad, Poor Dad. My own "rich dad" was inspired by this book and so I thought, it can't hurt. This was actually the book that sparked my further discovery of personal finances and has lead me to now subscribing to magazines on the subject as well as reading 3 other books.

The author heavily defines his theories on finance by the belief that things are either an asset or a liability. I won't give you a mini lecture here about what that means in the finance world, though I would strongly recommend if you don't understand these concepts that you do some financial soul searching of your own. Or if you know what they mean but you still think your car or house are assets: Robert T has some words of wisdom for you...get the book.

I think that men can also be put into these two categories (or girls, if you're a guy and reading this). The people you date are either an asset or a liability. Please don't kid yourself into believing that they are the perfect mix of both. In relationships as in money matters, people too frequently want to believe there's this huge grey area, that when we get honest with each other we know doesn't actually exist. Justify your dating choices to your friends or parents all you want - but if you find that you're kidding yourself, you're in trouble. You're also not alone.

Some say that marriage is a business transaction. While I'm not in favor of taking the romance out of relationships - I'm a sucker for love - I am inclined to agree on some levels. The top two reasons people get divorced are money & sex. So argue as much as you like, but money has plenty to do with marriage. From how the courtship goes, to the size of the engagement ring, to what kind of wedding you have, where you honeymoon, how long the marriage lasts, how difficult it is, and sadly - it has a profound affect on divorce rates.

Here are some of the men I will, for now, define as liabilities and therefore avoid:

- Guys who haven't finished school
- Guys who still live at home
- Guys without full time jobs
- Guys who ask if my Dad could help them get a career in the NFL
- Guys who do not own cars (unless they live in NYC, that's acceptable)
- Guys who believe that a woman's sole role in the world is having babies and doing his housekeeping

OK a few quick explanations of this, as I may be seeming a bit harsh. If a guy hasn't finished school, who's to say he will? Education ranks high on my priority list and I want to instill in my future children (should I have them) that education is both a privilege and a necessity. This would be rather hard to do if my partner isn't on board with that mentality. Also, education prepares you for careers - something I would like my future spouse to have. I worked my tail off for 4 years for my degree, I don't think it's an unreasonable expectation of someone else.

Typically (though arguably not always) guys who live at home A. are not providing for themselves, B. are quite use to having their mamas do things for them & C. have not developed the kind of leadership skills I think the future "head of my household" should have. This is not to say that everyone doesn't fall on hard times, and turning to your family for help is certainly acceptable. I'm more aiming this list item at late 20-somethings or older who have yet to strike out on their own. The world is waiting friends - get out there.

If they do not have a full-time job, they're out for now. This is not directly related to money as I have plenty of rich friends who hardly work. This is more related to work ethic. I want to know that my "partner" is willing to work, hard. Because relationships are hard work - and I'm not willing to do 100% of that work, 100% of the time. Nor do I think I should have too. I work 1.5 jobs myself, so again I'm not asking for anything I'm not doing.

List item four should be self-explanatory. If your looking to mooch your career off my Dad, you're out. Doneso. So if you're looking for an internship, job, try out, or other - call the office, not me. And yes, this happens regularly. I will also breeze by the car one - this is based on 2 guys I dated in the past. I do not have the time or energy to be any ones taxi. Therefore, they need their own way to get around. Period.

I'm not a raging feminist. I shave my legs. I wear makeup almost daily. I love high heels enough to have than 50 pairs. I'm all for enjoying being a girl. As Marilyn Monroe once said "I'm fine with living in a man's world, as long as I can be a girl in it". However, I'm not old fashion either. I have asked guys out before. I will express my feelings before they have if that's the way it goes. I've been the first to initiate a kiss. I frequently offer or even insist on paying on a date. I love working and I don't plan to give up having a career anytime soon (if ever). So, for me, it makes sense not to date someone whose expectation is that I'm ready to table my career to be Suzy Homemaker. For some, this is what they want - go for it. For me, it is not.

I will add to this list later I'm sure...as well as make one for assets. : ] Sorry to end this on a slightly negative note but I really must get back to work.

B

Monday, March 16, 2009

MM


I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure.  I make mistakes, I am out of control, and at times hard to handle.  But if you can't handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. -- Marilyn Monroe

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Little Ways to be a Better Friend

So I was reading in Glamour magazine last night about life, love, fashion, stars, books, etc and I came across an article titled, "6 Little Ways to be a Better Friend".  Here's two I wanted to share (thanks Lauren Bradshaw).

Be Cash-Conscious - In this economy it pays to be sensitive to her budget when making plans or divvying up a check.  It's also a great time to be resourceful with what you already have.  I'm gifting some of my frequent flier miles to a friend so she can visit her family overseas.

I love this.  This related so much to what Mer and I have been talking about recently and working at when we're together.  Not so much sending each other overseas but about how to be a cash-conscious friend in these economically trying times.  As I've learned more about finances over the last few months I've tried to encourage several of my friends to pursue the same interest.  Helping my friends become financially stable has been a rewarding endeavor and I'm taking a large amount of pride in the successes I'm seeing them have.  Having the benefit of starting out ahead of the game - I'm trying to find creative and constructive ways to contribute to my friends financial success.

Look out for her - even when she's not looking - Talk her up, tag only flattering pictures of her, and in general show the same thoughtfulness Bellows (author of The Fun Book for Girlfriends) does when she shops the sale racks: "I always check for my friends' sizes, too.  I just found one a great J. Crew sweater!"

I like this in contrast to a quote I read last night in my latest book, "The Queen of Babble in the Big City" which reads, "To find out a girl's faults, praise her to her girlfriends" - Benjamin Franklin.

Ouch.  

Bennie has a good point though.  If you start saying nice things about a girl to one of her friends, so often they start dishing dirt.  Why is that?  Why are we so programmed to think that someone else's success is our failure?  Even with friends!  And so I like this step to being a better friend because it challenges us to build up and promote our friends instead of tear them down in an attempt to make ourselves feel better!  I do not wish to succeed at the expensive of my friends but to enjoy my success along side them as we figure things out together.

Who says you can't learn anything valuable from Fashion Magazines?

Love,
B

Monday, March 9, 2009

Addendum to B's freshman year post, plus the background on Mer.

I must say that freshman year was by far one of my favorites. I was SO scared to meet this Becca character who, according to google maps, had a pond in her neighborhood, according to google had an "all pro dad", and according to her email, had a best friend named Gabe with dreds (I may have sent you a hundred pics of me, but I still don't know why the first picture you ever sent me was Gabe's senior picture!). Yes, I conducted thorough research on this character who would be sharing an 8 by 16 cell with me and all of my prized possessions. Yes, she had passed my polygraph test with flying colors. But no, there was NO way I was going to be in that room when she moved in. I remember sheepishly coming in for 5 minutes, meeting Deb, Ruthie, and Becca, and then awkwardly excusing myself until about bedtime that night. But, as Becca noted, we became fast friends. And the underwear didn't bother me, as long as it wasn't a thong ;). I did enough to embarass myself that year, so you in your underwear was the least of my worries!

B covered a good portion of our antics (feel free to post that email!) but there are some she missed. One thing is that I went through 4 computers that year. Becca came home many times to find me without a shirt on (so the sweat produced walking to and from campus could dry between classes) sitting at her desk on her Mac, surrounded by a wall of her belongings I had built. I was a turd, I admit it!

Some of my favorite times were these: the funeral procession we somehow got roped into planning for a neighbor's hamster, B letting out a bit of gas while meeting aforementioned neighbor for the first time and everyone acting like it didn't happen, sleeping with our mattresses side by side on the floor for like a week, all of the amazing Easy Mac Becs made for the entire 6th floor for board game nights, roadtrips to visit each others families, countless ridiculous pictures, and all of our many pets we accumulated that year (a hamster, a rat, and an unspecified number of beta fish).

I am SO glad I went potluck, even moreso now looking back on the memories.

And what about this mysterious M, the third beauty who graces this page with her wit and intellect? Well I met Mer once, didn't remember her, but thank God met her again a year later! We worked together for a few months, and then I took a Telefund hiatus for about a year. Summer after sophomore year, a friend urged me to come back, and introduced me to Miss Mer in the meantime. We had 3 out of 3 classes together that first summer, and became inseperable. We worked out, laid out, and studied the night away many a night. We were besties from there forward, simply because we were the same people separated for far too long. Well, that and the fact that I had no less than 3 classes a semester with her for pretty much the next 2 years, not to mention work, lunch dates all the time, and all of the same friends! Putting my memories with Mer on paper would take days. After all, we have traveled Europe, love, work, basically everything, together for 3 years now. I am so glad I introduced her to Becca through Monday night The Hills nights too, because they are kindred spirits who each have a piece of my heart down in Florida.

That about sums that up. Gathering my thoughts on a blog about peoples' perceptions of wealth and money. Stay tuned ;)

A

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Orlando


These creepers wanted their pic taken with us (Mer on left, me on right).
Mer, Kate, & I @ Carrabas.  Poor people there, they got so much more fun than they bargained for.

I (Becca) just got back from going to see Mer in Orlando.  This weekend was JUST what the Doctor ordered.  Lys, wish you could have been there.  We missed you.  I have to go work a few hours (I'm punishing myself for spending too much money at the outlet mall...).  Will write a real blog soon.

B

Friday, March 6, 2009

Reality Bites

My sister sent me this quote via Picture Message:

"I can handle reality in small doses, but as a lifestyle, it's much too confining"

She said she thought of me when she saw the picture with that quote, and I, who personally think my sister is one of the funniest people on the planet, chuckle lightly to myself at work as I read it. After thinking about this idea for the last day or so, it's occurred to me that I don't want to be one of those people who takes life too seriously.

Example: I went to the doctor this week, expecting to pay X amount for my copay. The doctor's office is the most luxurious doctor's office I've ever seen (I think everyone knew how fascinated I was with all the gizmos and gadgets). I get all done with my appointment and head to the check-out desk to pay my copay, all by myself, like an adult. I get the news that my copay is DOUBLE what I thought it was going to be. Sigh. I pay it then immediately call my insurance company for an explanation, which they cannot give me because the claim won't show up for another MONTH. I think to myself, great, I'm screwed. Insurance sucks. Doctors suck. I'm never going to the doctor again.

After breathing for a moment and a good Mom convo, I realize I need to cut my losses and move on. The reality is that it was still much cheaper considering what I'd be paying had I not had insurance at all, so really there's nothing to freak out about. And I found out later that my company's copays had indeed all increased as of Jan. 1st. Lesson learned: as a grown-up, read everything that comes in the mail.

My point of all this: I had the money to pay for my doc appt. So what's the big deal? By making it a big deal, I was stressed out and whiny for a day. Yes, it's only a day, but by wallowing in the reality of having to PAY for doctor services, I wasted energy and time when I really should have just let it go to begin with. I'm healthy and everything costs something. I think it's one thing to be aware of the reality that nothing in life is free, but it's quite another to let it rule emotions and moods. I choose to accept reality, but I will not allow it to get the best of me.

{M}

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Accepted.

We were accepted as members of "Twenty-something bloggers" - the link is at the bottom of the page.

It is good to be accepted & it seems as though we are amongst good company.

A & B

Just a little history. Alyssa & I (Becca) were potluck roommates our freshman year at Purdue University. Boy did Shreve Hall get more than they bargained for with us! We had a great floor of girls though and many of the people we met living in the dorms are still friends of ours today! Hey A, do I have your permission to post the original e-mail you sent me when we got our assignment? Or at least a few of the 23482390 pics you sent me of yourself?

A called me the week after we got our assignments and asked me the funniest set of questions I've been asked to date. Including if I were a lesbian and if I tended to steal other peoples things. While valid questions, a little deep for the first convo, eh Lys? She later admitted that after our conversation when I told her I moved frequently because my Dad is an NFL football coach - she googled me. Bringing up the most unfortunate picture that's ever been taken of my family and remains on a charity website - still haunting me today!

She might have had the better set of questions but I think I win the award for getting comfortable too fast. I HATE sleeping in pjs as I find them to be incredibly restricting so on the first or second night of living together I asked her if she cared if I slept in my undies. Ha, sorry A - I probably could have stuck out the first week!

Our year as roommates sure was an interesting one. I still cringe at how filthy that room got - which I take 99% of the responsibility for. The other 1% I give to A for buying plants that grew very strange fungus within about 2 days. I'm still a little baffled by that. I think whatever sorority sold you those plants still owes you your money back!

We were most famous amongst our hall for our collection of Beta fish. This unfortunate trend came about during one of many late night walmart runs during which we felt sorry for the fish kept in Tupperware on the shelves. We bought two. After that day, we bought one every time we went to Walmart for over a month (which added up to...8? 12? I can't even remember now) and since they couldn't live together they were placed all over our room in vases that were supposed (note: supposed) to be cleaned weekly. I'm a little ashamed to say I think we flushed all the remaining ones just in time for Spring Break! Poor Betas...Florida was more important to us.

I really should get back to work on some things but I would like to end this entry on life in the dorms (which I'm guessing Alyssa will have some additions too) by saying that our RA was a strange one. She targeted A & I from the very beginning and begged us to help her with all of her weekly duties. A contributed some artistic abilities to the boards int he hallway. I got nominated for some kind of office for our hall - but never bothered to attend a meeting. So my main contribution to the year was holding back drunk girls hair while they puked in the bathroom (I believe I'm still owed a few favors from this - perhaps I should start collecting).

Anyway, our RA would come knocking on doors before all the events she was required to throw. None of these events got either of us excited and so, we devised a plan to get out of them. We would turn off all the lights and lock our door and hide until we were POSITIVE she had left to go wherever it was she wanted us to. Then we'd turn our lights back on and go about our night.

Oh Lys, I love you. I miss some of those moments!

B

Ps: Thanks for doing my eye makeup every day for 3 months because I liked yours better than mine. I still owe you a few.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

BAM.

Can I just point out please that our intials make the word BAM and I find that rather fitting?

No, no, no!

Every successful twenty-something has to master the art of saying 'no'. Caution: while this may sound simple it is a life-long battle for many people - and more specifically, for many women! Now what might I being referring too? Well, everything.

This entry is inspired by some self-examination I did following an assessment about women and their finances I took last night (at the start of the previously mentioned book). The question was in regards to lending money but that's not really what I'm going to be talking about in this entry.

As a comprehensive relationship educator - or "sex ed teacher" I teach students on a weekly basis how to say "no" when they're being pressured. We talk about body language and how to back up your words with your actions. We talk about reversing the pressure. And we talk about how to get yourself out of a situation if at first you don't succeed! Etc. So if these work for saying 'no' to sex (something plenty of women still need to master) then why can't it work for everything in life?

In the past 9 months of post-college young adulthood I have purposed to set some boundaries for myself. It is easy in this day and age to get over commited and bogged down in the load of life. I worked entirely too hard to get myself down to Florida to not enjoy my life here! And so, I have had to learn to say no. No, no, no!

For me one of my biggest challenges in this department is my desire to have a hand in EVERYTHING! I hate saying no because I truly WANT to say yes! I want to attend every event. I want to contribute money to every charity. I want to go to lunch with someone different every day of the work week (and every meal of the weekend). I want to fix everyones problems via phone, e-mail, coffee, etc. I want to get everything that needs to be done at work done! But ladies and gents, saying no is truly an art worth knowing.

Saying no to some friendships that were draggin gme down has given me more time to dedicate to the ones that matter! The ones in which I do not have to do 100% of the work. Can I get an amen? And saying no to some of the charities that have asked for my time and resources has freed both of those up for the ones that truly touch my heart! The ones that I most desire to see succeed I'm able to aid in that now! Saying no to every day lunch dates has let me say "yes" to having a REAL savings account - and 15 pounds less weight on me! And saying 'no' to too much work has allowed me to say yes to weekends away (like my upcoming Orlando weekend), beach days, walks, cooking, some Tivo endulging, etc.

So everyone, I challenge you to master the art of saying 'no' so that you can truly enjoy saying 'yes'.

Love,
B

Lifelong Learning Curve

I thought I learned a lot in college with four years of papers, tests, good friends, and Harry's. All of these powers combined equals a whole lot of learning happening. Then I graduated.

Here is a list of things, big or small, that I have learned since May 2008:

~I am capable of taking a risk and the whole world won't come crashing down

~I can be 1,000 miles away from everything I've ever known and survive. And like it.

~I don't miss snow.

~I want to be financially responsible and I can be, no matter what my salary may be

~If something is important to me, there's no reason why I shouldn't have it, do it, or live it.

~I'm coming to terms with the fact that I can't save the world all day every day.

~I want to be a lifelong learner, whether it's from grad school, books, friends, or family. I'm hoping for a nice combination of all of them.

I knew I would learn a lot after graduating because that's what life's all about. It's exciting learning more and more about yourself and the world around you. And while I accept the fact that it's not all roses all the time, I'm definitely looking forward to what's to come!

{M}

Monday, March 2, 2009

Life lessons can wait...I need to get some things off my mind about The Bachelor!

Some of my favorite times in the months since graduation last May have been those when I have a phone pressed to my ear. Let's be honest. College is the ultimate breeding ground for friendships, but not many of those last. When I walked across that stage behind Miss Meredith Evans to grab my diploma, I could not help but think of those friendships I made. There were a number of people who I had trusted with all of life's ups and downs, people that I met with regularly, that I partied with and that I bummed around home with, that I thought would be a friend forever. But my little comfort zone was being ripped apart. When not a mere 5 minutes away, who would I talk to about all of life's details, and who would I never see again? The result surprised me for a little while, but not for long. I am very fortunate to be able to say that I have had an incredible success rate. Not one of my best friends lives within an hour of me, yet I know just as much now about them as I did then. Yes, it is INCREDIBLY hard to maintain a friendship over the phone, but I am so thankful to have the close relationships that I have, those that have survived distance and incredible change, and that have provided me with almost a nightly phone date. My writing here is a testament to those bonds, and to the importance of a friend when going through one of the most confusing growth periods we will encounter.

This blog is about friendship. It's about growth and change, struggles and acceptance, unexpected lessons and a system of support throughout the whole process. Had you told me in May that I would rely on my cell phone as a lifeline for my friendships, I would have said "good luck with that!" and moved on. Thank you God for not letting me have that attitude. I would not have all of the lessons and anecdotes about life, love, survival, and this crazy little thing called growing up otherwise. I have spent so much time on the phone with these 2 ladies (and a couple of other very special people) discussing books, sharing discoveries, and trying to decipher just where we are supposed to be at this point in our lives that I could probably collaborate on a survival guide for the 20 something woman with them. Enjoy a sneak peak into those conversations. Laugh, learn, enjoy.

On that note...I need to get some things off my chest about one Jason Mesnick of Seattle, Washington. WTF?! This adorable man is the reason I gave The Bachelor and ABC one more chance to convince me that love can happen on television. However, I was very disappointed to find out that these people agreed to dupe America by taking part in a scripted circus surrounding one of the most sacred gifts in this world: A woman's heart. I would love to give Jason the benefit of the doubt here. I want to believe he had no idea about any of this, that he didn't want to be with Melissa anymore and that ABC forced him to give it a go with Molly to try and cover up yet another failed attempt at forever. But come on. No woman in their right mind would accept an offer of "forever" from a man who 2 seconds earlier broke the heart of his FIANCEE on national television. I asked her to be my wife, told her I loved her and not you, got down on one knee in front of the world telling her it was her and only her, but now I changed my mind. Wanna go grab coffee, oh my precious second choice, and see if forever is in our cards? I speak for every sane woman out there when I say ABSOLUTELY NOT! Come on Moll! You look at him with a smile, act like he didn't dump you for a different woman six weeks ago, hold his hand, and say of course I love you and want to be with you! This had to be scripted. There is no way this would have happened in the real world and garnered the same response. I'd rather lose faith in The Bachelor as opposed to womankind. Shame on you Jason. Shame on you Molly, and ABC, and everyone involved. Good luck Melissa. You should have kept the 4 carat diamond.

A

Sophie Tucker Says...

From birth to age eighteen a girl needs good parents.  From eighteen to thirty-five she needs good looks.  From thirty-five to fifty-five she needs a good personality.  From fifty-five on she needs cash.

The Art of Having it All.


I decided about a month ago that I wanted to have it all.  

I want success in every aspect of my life.  I don't just want to be great at my job I want to balance it all.  I want to be a great friend.  The thoughtful daughter.  A perfect sister.  A reader.  A writer.  The lifelong student (of various subjects). Financially saavy.  A fashionista.  Artist.  Critic.  Sports fanatic.

With the desire to have it all comes the question...how?  That question will continue to be that which I pursue through life and writing over the next...lifetime.  It's a journey that has only just begun and that will never truly end.

This month I have begun to tackle finances.  Eck, I know.  For being 23 and fresh out of college, I am ahead of the game.  However, the more I learn about finances the more I realize how little I know.  Confusing?  Yes.  Frustrating?  Incredibly.  I read Rich Dad, Poor Dad.  I learned I need to invest to get out of the "Rat Race" but then I didn't know anything about investing so I bought Suze Orman's "The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke" to learn the lingo and the starting point for people like me.

As I near the end of that I realize I have a libraries worth of finance books left to read if I'm ever going to master my finances.  And so, next up:

Nice Girls Don't Get Rich.  

I love her dedication which reads: "This book is dedicated to every woman who works too hard, earns too little, and never seems to get ahead financially.  I hope that within these pages you find the courage and wisdom needed to take whatever action is required to lead a rich life - however you choose to define it"

In the spirit of having it all - I took today off work to do work.  While I've been slaving away at my desk at work, the work I have at home has been piling up.  So today I left my work in my Outlook and piled on my desk to face that which was piling up here at home.  So with taxes filed, clean bedsheets, 4 less episodes of Keeping up with the Kardashians on my Tivo, a much needed manicure, and a few less phone calls to friends on the ever-growing list - I'm winding down yet another Monday.

Just another manic Monday.

B


The Idea.

The inspiration for this blog came from my struggle to figure out life.  I have several wonderful friends who are going through the same process and have fought through the nitty gritty details of this thing called life with me over the past few months.  Lord love them, they put up with my daily phone calls about each of my new discoveries or adventures.

We are in different cities (and states), various careers, a range of love lives, and ultimately figuring out life in our twenties one day and experience at a time.

So, this blog is our chance to share these growing experience with each other and with others who feel the same.  I imagine it will be hilarious at time, endearing in moments, and ultimately incredibly entertaining.

So, we'll see how it goes.  Feedback always welcomed.
 
20sb