Tuesday, March 3, 2009

No, no, no!

Every successful twenty-something has to master the art of saying 'no'. Caution: while this may sound simple it is a life-long battle for many people - and more specifically, for many women! Now what might I being referring too? Well, everything.

This entry is inspired by some self-examination I did following an assessment about women and their finances I took last night (at the start of the previously mentioned book). The question was in regards to lending money but that's not really what I'm going to be talking about in this entry.

As a comprehensive relationship educator - or "sex ed teacher" I teach students on a weekly basis how to say "no" when they're being pressured. We talk about body language and how to back up your words with your actions. We talk about reversing the pressure. And we talk about how to get yourself out of a situation if at first you don't succeed! Etc. So if these work for saying 'no' to sex (something plenty of women still need to master) then why can't it work for everything in life?

In the past 9 months of post-college young adulthood I have purposed to set some boundaries for myself. It is easy in this day and age to get over commited and bogged down in the load of life. I worked entirely too hard to get myself down to Florida to not enjoy my life here! And so, I have had to learn to say no. No, no, no!

For me one of my biggest challenges in this department is my desire to have a hand in EVERYTHING! I hate saying no because I truly WANT to say yes! I want to attend every event. I want to contribute money to every charity. I want to go to lunch with someone different every day of the work week (and every meal of the weekend). I want to fix everyones problems via phone, e-mail, coffee, etc. I want to get everything that needs to be done at work done! But ladies and gents, saying no is truly an art worth knowing.

Saying no to some friendships that were draggin gme down has given me more time to dedicate to the ones that matter! The ones in which I do not have to do 100% of the work. Can I get an amen? And saying no to some of the charities that have asked for my time and resources has freed both of those up for the ones that truly touch my heart! The ones that I most desire to see succeed I'm able to aid in that now! Saying no to every day lunch dates has let me say "yes" to having a REAL savings account - and 15 pounds less weight on me! And saying 'no' to too much work has allowed me to say yes to weekends away (like my upcoming Orlando weekend), beach days, walks, cooking, some Tivo endulging, etc.

So everyone, I challenge you to master the art of saying 'no' so that you can truly enjoy saying 'yes'.



  1. AMEN SISTER! Saying no is such a freeing experience. I don't know why people don't do it more often.

  2. Ha ha right? Well I'll post later about how I had to face my own advice today. : ]